Jack Rikess, a former stand-up comedian, takes the edge off of the world and explains all those unexplained things in a way that will make you either laugh or cry.

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Let Da Feds In and Bust Everyone, Please



“The best way to get a bad law repealed is to enforce it strictly.”

-Abraham Lincoln, theater-goer and lawyer.


My regular readers have graciously written to me, acknowledging that I have been right on topic concerning the issue of Legalization of Marijuana, and Da Feds.

For the uninitiated, I’ve stated that unless the Feds are in the room for the discussion of what is going to happen after Proposition 19 passes, there isn’t any discussion.

So the big news last week was that Attorney General Eric Holder promises to ‘Enforce U.S. drug laws,” when Prop.19 passes.

I say let him.

I’m sorry to be like this. I’m not trying to be didactic or presumptuous, but I would like to remind my readers of one of my central themes, THE POLITICAL BULLSHIT SURROUNDING THE WEED, WE CALL MARIJUANA.


Where Bullshit and History collide:

After countless generations of helping humanity with everything from hemp products that gave the ancient mariners sails to the Founding Fathers who wrote the Constitution on hemp, Marijuana has always been with us.

We all know the stories of Queen Victoria taking WEED for her visits from the royal Aunt Flo to the tales of mid-wives and herbalists who prescribe the tantalizing WEED for a number of home-cure recipes for health and happiness to regular folk for centuries.

But that all changed in the Thirties when Mr. Randolph Hearst of the castle tours fame, formed an evil conspiracy with Misters Du Pont (one word: plastics) and the Secretary of Treasury, Mr. Mellon, to create the ‘Marihuana Tax Act of 1937.’

Marijuana was ruining the paper industry that Mr. Hearst had bet his forests on. Du Pont didn’t like all the applications that hemp could do faster, easier, cheaper and less polluting than his plastics and chemicals could. And Mr. Mellon was use to make money.

So this high ranking cabal started stories of fear in Mr. Hearst’s newspapers. It is hard to believe in these days of open-mindedness that a paper could scare their citizens by publishing untruths, but it is right there in the history pages to be seen.

Newspapers across the country started to run false stories of Mexicans and Negroes with machetes and rusty knives killing innocent white families while having their Sunday dinner, including the blameless God-fearing children and their high-jumping, playful collies that never hurt anyone. These bad guys high on this new drug that most people had never heard of were going on rampages in towns just like yours, killing law-abiding good, Christian people and taking their jobs, too. And your town is next. Beware!

Then Secretary Mellon took advantage of his position and placed his nephew, Harry Anslinger, in charge of the new Treasury department of, Federal Bureau of Narcotics.

And just to make sure there isn’t opposition to this new drug, against the wishes and protests of the American Medical Association, they made it a Schedule One (I) drug, in the same classification as Heroin and Cocaine. Morphine and a drug named Fentanyl, which is about a billion times stronger than Morphine, are Schedule Two (II) drugs.

That was pretty much the nail in the coffin for Marijuana for almost a hundred years.

So here’s the story kids when Prop.19 passes, it is going to be a huge clusterfuck. For three or four months, politicians and law makers are going to be arguing and debating the most simple stuff such as, “Where is the Shit going to be sold at?” A liquor store? A Pot shop? How much product can one store have? And where do they get it from?

Forget all that. The way the law is written now, every county in Cali can have their own rules. Right now, there isn’t one discernable pattern one could deduce on how it is all going to roll out in January after the sticky bill passes.

There are three major issues when it comes to WEED and Legalization that need to be worked out until we can really move forward. They are cultivation, commerce and transportation. Until you have firm, consistent laws regulating those three bad boys, L.A. will go crazy and Orange County will hire high high-price lawyers trying to take over a business they have no business belonging in.

These issues need to be simplified and cohesive for every county, otherwise, lawsuits, lawsuits, lawsuits.

Which might not be bad…

   So this is what it all gets down to, ‘The Law of the Land.’

That isn’t a made up term. It’s in the Constitution. In the Constitution is the Supremacy Clause. The Supremacy Clause supersedes all other laws, supposedly. Local judges are supposed to enforce the laws of the Constitution.

This now begins the debate of State’s Rights versus Federal Rights. And this is where it gets really murky and becomes the argument about who can scream the loudest.

Are you for Segregation? It took the Feds to come in and bust up Little Rock so five African-Americans could attend school. And the other side, Arizona voted that if you are not White, you could be pulled over and given a ticket for driving without papers because of the hue of your skin. Arizona voters voted on it. Every state has different drinking and gun laws. That’s okay.

Oregon has assisted-suicide that is against the law, but the Feds look the other way for that transgression.

When the Feds look the other way and decide not to do anything legally about that contravention, it is called, ‘The Mood of the Land.’ We believe in the separation of Church and State. It is right there in the Constitution. But if Muslims want to open a recreation center four New York city-blocks from Ground Zero; we don’t care what the law says. That is when the Mood of the Land card gets played. We are against concentration or prison camps, unless something happens to us like Pearl Harbor. Then the rule book is thrown out and the Mood of the Land takes over.

So I say, after Proposition 19 passes, bust us. Take us to task. Enforce this stupid law that should have never been enacted. It was started with prejudice and has escalated into fear and jail-time for many innocent Americans.

The rest of the nation is looking at us to see what is going to happen. Countries like Mexico and other neighbors would consider Legalization if it works here in California.

Bust us. This time, arrests the sons and daughters of New Money and Legislators this time as they light up somewhat legally in January. Kill their future aspirations and hopes, stalling their careers with penalties and persecution because of POT. Instead of profiling hippies and the usual suspects, bust the unknowns. No longer can you be sure that just because they are smoking DOPE, there is something wrong with them.

No, kill the perception that all DOPE smokers are slackers and couch-sitters. Show the Mood of the Land that we’re here to stay. And when you bust us, you’re busting yourself, in the name of your kids.

The Marijuana laws have always been bad and unfair. There are imposed to drive out a certain sect of society.

Alcohol, tobacco, and caffeine aren’t even included in our lexicon of drugs. They get free reign because the Money People say so.

43 million Americans smoke POT. It brings in 35 billion alone to the state of California. We’re not going backwards.

To Eric Holder I say, thank you. Please come here and bust us. Make us take a position on something that we have let slide for years. In the age of For-Profit prisons, we need to ask ourselves, “Who are we and what do we want?”

It is going to take us Potheads to stand up, organize, and set the record straight, as it were.

Until Marijuana is removed as a Schedule I drug, the Feds believe they have the right to arrest us. And they do, when it comes to the Law of the Land. We need to change the Mood of the Land, so we can change the Law of the Land.

Maybe then we could work out the compassion issue. Is Marijuana a medicine or is it a recreational drug? Or, OMG, could it be both?  

I once saw in the movies, a western, where the country doc was working on a patient and he took a slug of the alcohol before he used it as an antiseptic. I dunno.

Eric Holder, without you and the Feds, we are like WEEDS blowing in the wind. You compliment us. We want to be legit. We won’t be legit until the vagueness of these laws disappears. Give us direction by telling us what we’re doing wrong. Gives us a standard to go by, and we will. Most of us are trying to be law-abiding citizens. Now if we could only get the rest of the country on board.

Bust us. Articulate your position, Mr. Holder. Try to defend your side with archaic decisions made by devious men for their own gains. And then when the bong smoke clears and your legal heads spin with a history of bad judicial arbitration, make us legal.

And then, let’s just get on with it and start living the way we’re supposed to, like adults who make adult decisions.

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